The Trio is the best part of this season of White Lotus, and really works in terms of reflecting the dynamics that any person, especially a Gen Xer, can relate to.
I was going to say I'd love a series focused on exploring longtime friendship dynamics but then realized that we're kind of getting that with the new Netflix series The Four Seasons and the FX series Dying for Sex (which looks AMAZING).
Omg yes, I felt like I could relate to all three of them at different times and that last episode was so triggering! The Four Seasons is SO X-y and I mainlined all the episodes in one afternoon. I need to start Dying For Sex though but yeah, loving all this exploration of Gen X friendships now.
Just catching up on my reads – wow this is fascinating! I have yet to catch any of White Lotus, but reading what you have captured has brought back memories and made me think, as it will for many, and evoked, as you say,
visceral reactions, thinking of Gen X friendships over the years, ones that have stood the test of time and those that haven’t, why, and when. 🥹 And I’m so sorry to read about what you went through during the pandemic, Fawnia ❤️ - we’ve had many conversations here over the last week or so about the emotional and mental experience of that and its resonances. On a totally lighter note, I’m with you Cheryl on the capris!! 🫣 And your description is hilarious of what we over here called knickerbockers 😳– I think that’s even worse?! We also called them pedal pushers? 🚲 And I really hope I can access that New York Times article, it sounds super interesting. XX
Aw thank you Jenni. I didn’t have room to include it but Liz Feldman and I also talked about how the pandemic and all that trauma also created a friend filter, like reevaluating who isn’t bringing value to your life, but it was also a time where we became closer friends with some. So much to think about when it comes to longtime friends. And this season of The White Lotus is a lot!! Knickerbockers is funny since knickers means underwear over there! I’m not very excited for this return either. Let me know if you need a gift link to the NYT story, too. I’m still reading it and I feel extremely seen.
I loved this because yes this season of The White Lotus and the blonde bob are representing a type of women friend group and it’s a rough watch.
I never had a lot of friends as a teenager (which was both my introversion and my circumstances with my mom who passed). I had a few close ones and even at times like 1-3. That said, as both a young adult and into my current years many of my friends have been a few years younger so more on the Millenial cusp side and it’s felt like a good fit. Though I have plenty of Gen X friends too. I have an inherent discomfort in women groups (defined as anything more than 2) but I can’t point to why. I guess with my introversion I feel like I get more lost and my voice less heard. I find the interactions less nourishing and meaningful. It doesn’t necessarily equate to things being more competitive but sometimes it can feel like I’m edged out
I’m so sorry about your mom. I lost mine in my early 30s — it must have been so hard as a teen. I definitely get that about friend groups and related dynamics, too. I’m on the quieter side and find I have to really make an effort to be heard in big groups. It takes a lot of energy! You definitely have deeper conversations in those one-on-one situations. And as a former trio member, I can guarantee that sting of feeling left out doesn’t go away with age. Thank you for sharing with us and for reading ❤️
Thank you for your kind message. Sorry to hear you lost your mom. And it’s nice to relate to someone on this “odd duck out” feeling in groups larger than 2. I will say as an adult I’ve really enjoyed my friendships. We don’t tell each other, “omg you’re amazing, no you’re amazing etc” like the blond bob but we are genuinely happy for one another and celebrate successes and are there to lend an ear and support for the challenging stuff. I’ve always been more on the serious and reflective side which means letting loose and being a partier aren’t my go-to(s). More like eat really good food, enjoy walks and culture (book stores and museums), drink amazing coffee, and see a movie!
Thank you ❤️ That’s great you have these supportive and rewarding friendships now. I think old friendships formed when we’re more fully formed, like in college and as young adults, can be longer lasting, too. I’m also finding that making new friends now is really rewarding, even if it’s an effort to put yourself out there. I think you’d appreciate Liz Feldman’s podcast “Here to Make Friends,” especially the Tig Notaro one!
I shared some real doozy friend stories with Fawnia when she was writing this (sorry, those will stay in the WNVM cone of silence!) but I will say that I broke up with my best college friend after the 2016 election. She and I ended up screaming at each other in the parking lot of a suburban mall restaurant. (Hoping that did not end up on YouTube because it was the holidays and a ton of people were around 😬)
The Trio is the best part of this season of White Lotus, and really works in terms of reflecting the dynamics that any person, especially a Gen Xer, can relate to.
I was going to say I'd love a series focused on exploring longtime friendship dynamics but then realized that we're kind of getting that with the new Netflix series The Four Seasons and the FX series Dying for Sex (which looks AMAZING).
Omg yes, I felt like I could relate to all three of them at different times and that last episode was so triggering! The Four Seasons is SO X-y and I mainlined all the episodes in one afternoon. I need to start Dying For Sex though but yeah, loving all this exploration of Gen X friendships now.
Just catching up on my reads – wow this is fascinating! I have yet to catch any of White Lotus, but reading what you have captured has brought back memories and made me think, as it will for many, and evoked, as you say,
visceral reactions, thinking of Gen X friendships over the years, ones that have stood the test of time and those that haven’t, why, and when. 🥹 And I’m so sorry to read about what you went through during the pandemic, Fawnia ❤️ - we’ve had many conversations here over the last week or so about the emotional and mental experience of that and its resonances. On a totally lighter note, I’m with you Cheryl on the capris!! 🫣 And your description is hilarious of what we over here called knickerbockers 😳– I think that’s even worse?! We also called them pedal pushers? 🚲 And I really hope I can access that New York Times article, it sounds super interesting. XX
Ok so knickers<->knickerbockers makes sense then!!! Pedal pushers make me think of Audrey Hepburn
Yes!!!! 🙌
Aw thank you Jenni. I didn’t have room to include it but Liz Feldman and I also talked about how the pandemic and all that trauma also created a friend filter, like reevaluating who isn’t bringing value to your life, but it was also a time where we became closer friends with some. So much to think about when it comes to longtime friends. And this season of The White Lotus is a lot!! Knickerbockers is funny since knickers means underwear over there! I’m not very excited for this return either. Let me know if you need a gift link to the NYT story, too. I’m still reading it and I feel extremely seen.
So so true - all of this. And thank you 🙏 re NYT - I’ll check! xx
I loved this because yes this season of The White Lotus and the blonde bob are representing a type of women friend group and it’s a rough watch.
I never had a lot of friends as a teenager (which was both my introversion and my circumstances with my mom who passed). I had a few close ones and even at times like 1-3. That said, as both a young adult and into my current years many of my friends have been a few years younger so more on the Millenial cusp side and it’s felt like a good fit. Though I have plenty of Gen X friends too. I have an inherent discomfort in women groups (defined as anything more than 2) but I can’t point to why. I guess with my introversion I feel like I get more lost and my voice less heard. I find the interactions less nourishing and meaningful. It doesn’t necessarily equate to things being more competitive but sometimes it can feel like I’m edged out
I’m so sorry about your mom. I lost mine in my early 30s — it must have been so hard as a teen. I definitely get that about friend groups and related dynamics, too. I’m on the quieter side and find I have to really make an effort to be heard in big groups. It takes a lot of energy! You definitely have deeper conversations in those one-on-one situations. And as a former trio member, I can guarantee that sting of feeling left out doesn’t go away with age. Thank you for sharing with us and for reading ❤️
Thank you for your kind message. Sorry to hear you lost your mom. And it’s nice to relate to someone on this “odd duck out” feeling in groups larger than 2. I will say as an adult I’ve really enjoyed my friendships. We don’t tell each other, “omg you’re amazing, no you’re amazing etc” like the blond bob but we are genuinely happy for one another and celebrate successes and are there to lend an ear and support for the challenging stuff. I’ve always been more on the serious and reflective side which means letting loose and being a partier aren’t my go-to(s). More like eat really good food, enjoy walks and culture (book stores and museums), drink amazing coffee, and see a movie!
Thank you ❤️ That’s great you have these supportive and rewarding friendships now. I think old friendships formed when we’re more fully formed, like in college and as young adults, can be longer lasting, too. I’m also finding that making new friends now is really rewarding, even if it’s an effort to put yourself out there. I think you’d appreciate Liz Feldman’s podcast “Here to Make Friends,” especially the Tig Notaro one!
Going to find the podcast now. I love Tig!
I shared some real doozy friend stories with Fawnia when she was writing this (sorry, those will stay in the WNVM cone of silence!) but I will say that I broke up with my best college friend after the 2016 election. She and I ended up screaming at each other in the parking lot of a suburban mall restaurant. (Hoping that did not end up on YouTube because it was the holidays and a ton of people were around 😬)
I’m sorry — it’s so hard with old friends. So many memories and emotions attached!